Lighthouses

A lighthouse doesn’t calm the sea.

It helps you navigate it.

A lighthouse is not a ship’s engine.

It doesn’t propel the vessel.

It doesn’t choose the destination.

It simply helps sailors see more clearly.

Looking back, I sometimes confused being supported with being dependent.

People in our lives — and sometimes people we don’t know personally — help us find our bearings. Being around others settles my nervous system. In the middle of this rupture, I can feel how essential connection, movement, and shifts in energy are, especially during uncertain stretches while waiting for clarity.

Over these weeks, it has mattered to surround myself with people who care about me — who support my healing.

An ex‑husband who calls almost daily and gets me out of the house even when I don’t feel up to it.

A friend who makes space in his busy life to take me out for a drink, to catch up, to help me think through my next move.

My childhood best friend calling to reminisce, bringing me to tears of laughter instead of tears of sorrow.

Visiting friends — even traveling to be with them — leaves me more grounded, more centered, and a little further along in becoming the woman I’m working toward.

My life still includes other relationships, and nurturing them matters.

Lighthouses don’t always have to be people.

Throughout my life, there have been many lighthouses:

A book that arrived at exactly the right moment.

A café where I could write or read with the hum of other lives in the background, settling my inner turmoil when my heart felt shattered.

Walking through a new city, eating at a local spot, laughing at whatever ends up funny — even when traveling alone.

Healing isn't found only in reflection. It's found in living.

Sometimes even a painful experience becomes its own lighthouse, illuminating something I couldn’t see before.

Some lighthouses stay for years.

Others appear only long enough to reveal a dangerous reef before disappearing over the horizon.

Their value isn’t measured by how long they remain visible.

It’s measured by what they help us see.

A seaworthy ship still appreciates a lighthouse.

Not because it cannot sail.

But because even experienced navigators value good light.